Paranoia

I'm Ain and I am paranoid.

Yes, I'm not kidding. I think my paranoia has hit an all time high these few years. I didn't think it was that serious. Then, it grew into a habit to be perfect each time and never satisfied. I take everything that has happened to me into a different level. I get jittery or nervous or some may call "Kanchong spider" moment. Seriously, I would literally have a mental block about what to do at times during work. Which could be much to my dismay.

I can't believe I have a problem. I always thought it was a habit that I could kick. Oh crap. I'm paranoid. I think the customer would get mad if i pin slowly, i think people are judging me everytime, I think my friends abandoned me when they haven't. I can't stand it if people don't like me. Oh GOD. I've turned crazy. I'm paranoid. I even think a cat would scratch me if I touched it.

I just read an article about paranoia: feelings of inferiority. I have tt! I can be catagorised. Thank gdness Aman found for me a website tt says that there are others like me. Gosh. I didn't think there were. I thought I was the only person this crazy. This insane person who needs perfection to everything. What's worst is that its lifelong. Then again, I'm reading way into this. Am I?

I don't even know when I'm being paranoid. Sigh. I need help.

P.S: To the cruel idiot, ur an asshole.